Monday, 3 August 2015

IVF: Post egg collection - days 1 and 2

Day of egg collection - after the procedure
We returned to our short stay apartment full of many different types of emotions, and began to process how we were feeling after the events of the morning. For me quite a lot of it is still a bit of a blur - I can only liken it to when you are drunk (a rarity for me!) and wake up the next morning not quite remembering all of it, but having certain moments etched in your mind. I remember lying on the sofa, pressed in to my wife and crying and crying and crying. We both needed to let all of the emotion of the day out, and then we could talk about it more rationally. I remember I fell asleep for a while afterwards, and woke up somewhere near dinner time. For Sarah the worst part was seeing her wife in pain, distressed, upset - seeing the person you love most like that is really hard.
 We ended up having quite a nice evening, Sarah cooked us a lovely and very welcome dinner (I was amazed at how hungry I was), and we watched some of our favourite shows on Netflix. The important thing for me was that we were together. I didn't want to be anywhere but in her arms. The pain came in waves. The doctor explained that blood is an irritant, and I had blood and fluid collected in places that it shouldn't, so until that fluid subsides, I will be in pain. He also explained that that was the pain I'd felt in the morning, because I'd already ovulated, so fluid/blood had collected were it shouldn't. It was entirely bearable though, with a hot water bottle, and we were both able to sleep properly last night.


Day one post egg collection - the phone call!
This morning I woke up with one thought on my mind, "how many have fertilised?". It was early, and Sarah was still fast asleep beside me, so I lay there for a while and thought through yesterday. I can't help but feel let down by my body. Sarah and my sister have both told me I am silly for feeling this way. But it was all going so well, we were going to have loads of eggs, I am in the optimal fertility category remember…and we ended up with four eggs. Four. And yet I have no control over it. My body ovulated. And in addition to that, we now have to wait until we can do a frozen embryo transfer. Sarah wants this baby just as much as I do. Our Mums are beside themselves with excitement that they might get to become grandmothers...

It's so hard to go through all of that, and then feel like you've failed. I rolled over in my head what we might do if none of the four had fertilised. Would I go through IVF again? Yes. Even though yesterday didn't pan out exactly as planned, we have both found the whole process exciting, magical and amazing. Physically it hasn't been nearly as hard as I thought it'd be, and I'd happily go through it again. But then again we have seen through this process that I really am fairly fertile, we now know that my eggs seem quite decent, and the sperm is of really good quality too - so maybe we should just give IUI a shot instead. So much going round and round and round my head, so I decided to just snuggle in to wife, and try to stop this endless barrage of endless pointless thoughts.

We had asked that the embryologist phone Sarah this morning, not knowing how I would be feeling. Typically she rang as were sat eating the gorgeous vegan bacon sandwiches Sarah had just made us! Not that we minded one bit, we were both so anxious to hear the news. The embryologist was lovely, and was very pleased to report we had…
 three fertilised embryos! Three!

She said all four eggs were mature, and three had gone on to fertilise in the night. They all looked in their early stages to be good quality, and so they were planning to take them to day 5 blastocyst stage, and then freeze them at that point. She also wanted to remind Sarah that our embryo transfer isn't that far away, approximately 6-8 weeks, so we need to focus on me getting better as quickly as possible, and then looking after my body in preparation to receive our embryo. She put the phone down and we shed some very very happy tears. I don't think either of us realised how anxious we were for this phone call until after we had received it! So, three lovely little embryos. 

        


It's bizarre to think our potential child, and even it's sibling, has already been created, and is sitting in a dish in Nottingham, developing as I type!

Two days post egg collection - dividing.
Sarah went back to work this morning. I cried as she left. I can't even say why, but my emotions are absolutely all over the place. This is like PMT multiplied by twenty! I decided I wanted to have a better day than I had yesterday, so set myself little tasks that I could do from the sofa. The pain is ever-present, particularly on the side that they retrieved all the fluid / eggs from, but getting easier all the time. It still means however that apart from walk Willow I can't do too much though.

After a couple of hours of completing mandatory online training to keep my midwifery registration, filling out all my work related spreadsheets and other very boring tasks that I normally put off, the clinic phoned. I'd almost forgotten they were going to phone again with news of our embryo babies.
The lovely embryologist explained that on Day 2 they expect the embryos to be between 2 and 5 cells, and in addition to that they grade them for quality (1 = highest, 4 = lowest). So we have…

1 x 2 cell grade 1
1 x 3 cell grade 2
1 x 4 cell grade 2

Perfect! I asked if they were happy with those numbers and he said they were very happy, so I said we are too! Everything is starting to settle and feel a lot clearer for us. We have our consultant appointment booked for next week to discuss the transfer of the frozen embryos, providing at least one of them continues to develop this well and can be frozen on day 5. I am starting to slowly feel better, and we have started to look in to frozen embryo transfers. Interestingly success rates are higher than for fresh cycles, I can only imagine it's because your body has already been through enough in a fresh IVF cycle that by the time you get to transfer day, expecting it to become pregnant is one too many hurdles. So we are focused on the future - getting me back to normal, and then preparing for what lies ahead. Hopefully, a pregnancy! We are trying to fill these days of waiting and wondering with little distractions - today Sarah changed the kitchen decor colours, and we've had a lot of lovely food! 
 Aswell as distractions we are full of positive thinking, imagining our lovely embryos getting bigger and stronger!
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1 comment:

  1. Reading your blog brings back fond memories. My wife and I live in Bromsgrove with our 21 month old twins. They were conceived through IVF. Good luck on your journey and enjoy it xx

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